My husband and I have been talking about a kitchen remodel for years, and when the doors to our cabinets literally began to fall off, we knew it was time!  We are still a ways from a final product, but I'm very happy with how the process has gone so far.  I planned more for this project than any other home improvement project, and it's been worth it!  

What I've learned so far:

• Start WAY in advance

Home improvement projects always take longer than expected, so start much earlier than you think is necessary.   A kitchen may be the most difficult of all remodeling projects and the timelines are longer than I ever would have expected.  5-6 weeks for cabinets to get in and ANOTHER 4-5 weeks for counter tops once cabinets are installed seems extreme, but once you know what to expect, you can begin the planning process.

• Ask lots of questions

Do your research!  Ask professionals and, more importantly, friends who have been through a similar project.  Ask for your family's input, too.  They will be the ones living with you in the space, so you want to make sure it's functional for them as well.  Things you want to learn about are style, color, materials, functionality, and durability.  

• Visualize the final product

Look at magazines, watch some home improvement shows, browse home home improvement stores, and of course create some Pinterest boards to help plan out your final design.  When you have a design in your mind, it's easier to make all the choices required for a remodeling project.

• Make your temporary space work for you

When you are remodeling a section of your home, it's an inconvenience not matter how you slice it.  Take a little extra time to set up the necessities in another area in your home.  Our family has been using our breezeway between the kitchen and garage as our temporary kitchen complete with our fridge, microwave, toaster oven and kitchen table.  Yeah, I washed dishes in my bathroom for a couple of weeks, but other than running water, I had everything I needed!

• ​Do first things first

Based on all the questions you asked earlier, you should know the pieces of the project that take the most time.  Make yourself a timeline so you don't have to put your project on hold or have your house torn up longer than necessary.  For example, we took measurements first, then found our installer which allowed us to get his input on materials and be aware of his availability.  Next we ordered cabinets so they would be delivered in the right window of time.  We knew we need to have our cabinets torn out, floor repaired and floor installed first, and we didn't want to have a kitchen's worth of cabinets taking up our garage space for longer than necessary.  

• Find the right person to do the work

Some of you are able to do home improvement projects on your own...and then there's the rest of us!  Finding someone who does quality work when they say the will do it at a reasonable price is one of the hardest parts of home ownership.  This is why asking around to others who have been through the same type of project you're doing is so valuable! Learn from their experience (and their failures!)  and ask for and take recommendations.  

• Be willing to wait for quality

Along the way, there are going to be surprises (especially if you live in an old house like mine!)  Try not to get frustrated if your well-laid plans get pushed back.  It's more important that the job get done right than get done fast.  Make sure to plan in some "fluff" time so that you don't end up having the painter scheduled to paint on the same day your counter tops are being installed because the cabinet installation was delayed due to unexpected issues with the floor.  If you build in some buffer days, your project will flow much more smoothly!

• Don't forget progress pictures!

It's so much fun to see those progress pictures.  It helps you appreciate how far you've come even when the project seems to be going slow.  When I look back at my green linoleum and what was under it, I'm even more grateful for my new, level floor!  We have a few more weeks before we can call the project complete, but we've come a long way!

I took a spring break from my blog.  I'll be honest - for these past couple of weeks, I didn't know what to write because I've been feeling very "out of order,"  and I felt a little like a fraud for even having this blog when I felt so out of control.  Control, that's a little word that seems to cause me so much trouble!

Last Sunday at church, was the first time in a while that I felt like it was ok to just sit and be.  I was allowed not to worry, not to feel guilty about all I should be doing, and didn't feel inadequate for the things I've been trying so hard to do and not succeeding at.  I was reminded that most of the minutia of my life, in the grand scheme of things, isn't really a big deal.  The things that ARE a big deal, well, I can't really change the outcome in any way by worrying or fixating on them. The Bible verse, "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?" from Luke 1225 is so true, so simple, and yet so hard to put into practice!  

Like so many of you, I'm a faithful This Is Us watcher, and a couple of episodes ago, Randall and Beth were shown as young parents, playing the "what's the worst that could happen" game.  I loved the reminder that even though there are always bad possibilities, the likelihood that they are going to happen is very slim, so it's not worth my energy to worry about them.  ​

Most of us have had times in our lives where we wake up with a sick feeling in the pit of our stomachs thinking about what could happen today, and sometimes we convince ourselves ahead of time that we know what the outcome will be.  I've learned through experience that there are two things I definitely can NOT do and those are predict the future or go back in time.   Because I can't do those things, I'm trying to make it a habit to focus only on what I can control and not what I can't.  It helps me to actually write out a list of each.   When I spend my time on what I can control, it makes it easier not to fret about the rest.  I realize now that being out of control is ok, is natural and once I accept it, can actually be freeing!

I found that the number of things  I can control is much less that what I cannot.  But that's what makes it manageable!  My general list of what I can control is just this:

• my bedtime and time I get up in the morning
• food that goes into my mouth
• words that come out of my mouth and my tone of voice
• if I wear a smile or a scowl
• the content of the written messages I send 
• the time I spend working vs. time spent (distraction free) with my family
• how much I move
• how much I read vs time I spend on a screen
• what I think about
• how I react
• how I plan ahead

I'm making it a new practice during my weekly review, to write down how I want these areas of my life to look in the next week.  Give it a try yourself! For example, this week I looked at my calendar of commitments and responsibilities and decided I could CONTROL going to bed by 10:30 and getting up at 6 this week, and I could CONTROL the snacks I pack in my lunchbox, and I could CONTROL going on a walk during my kids' sports practices this week, etc.