My boys share the responsibility of emptying the dishwasher each morning.  The oldest puts away the dishes, and the youngest puts away the silverware.  Sometimes they had a hard time telling if the dishes were clean or dirty, so I bought one of those magnets for your dishwasher that you flip over to indicate if you ran the dishwasher or not!

This is a great system - - if you use it.  I would often either forget to turn the magnet around, so when the boys got up in the morning and saw "dirty," they'd be thrilled with one less chore for the day.  Or, even worse, I would forget to run the dishwasher and leave the magnet saying "clean" causing dirty dishes to get put into our cabinets.  The magnet became so unreliable, my 8 year old son looked at my earnestly one morning, pointed at the dishwasher magnet and asked me, "Mom, does the magnet speak the truth?"  I cracked up, but it made me realize that if I didn't use the system faithfully, it became less efficient than not having a system at all.

Any productivity system has to be followed regularly and fully in order to be effective.  This can range from something as simple as a dishwasher magnet, to your shared calendar with your spouse, to your task management strategy.

​The key to staying regular with your systems is to develop them one at a time.  Read my previous post about how to track a new habit and get a free printable to help!  If you try to wake up one day and suddenly reinvent yourself with several new routines, habits and systems, you're not going to be successful.  Master one before adding in another.  For a system to work, you must set up in a way that is easy to maintain because if you don't consistently use the system, you won't trust it.  One  system that you have absolute trust in is your calendar!

Develop a Trusting Relationship with Your Calendar
Regardless of your preference between paper or digital, if you don't use your calendar for everything, you will lose confidence in it, and it becomes nearly useless!  I recommend a hybrid approach to a calendar with the primary tool being digital with a secondary physical calendar of some sort posted in your home.  Digital calendars allow you to capture appointments as soon as you are aware of them - enter in your kids' next dental cleaning before you leave the dentist's office and add the sports practice schedule to your calendar as soon as you receive the text from the coach.  Digital calendars make it easy to set recurring entries or record future appointments.  There are many tools available, but Google Calendar is one of the most popular (and my favorite!) 

Here are 5 ways to make your digital calendar your trusted helper:

1. View everything in one screen! - Set your phone up so that you can view any calendar that impacts your life all in one screen.  This could include your work, personal, and any shared calendars.  Each source can be set up to display entries in a different color to help you quickly differentiate between types of appointments .
2. Share! -  You are busy and likely share responsibilities with others - either at work or at home.  Set up shared calendars or use the invitation method to put items on your calendar that you need to be aware of.  For example, in our family, if my husband has an late meeting requiring me to pick up the kids, he sends me an invitation that says "Josh working late" or simply forwards me the meeting invitation from his calendar so I know where he'll be. 
3. Record EVERYTHING! - Put everything on your calendar that is time bound that impacts your day.  This includes recurring appointments, all day events, and  items that are for information only (like kids' picture day.)  Be vigilant so that you know what to expect from your day and don't waste your time trying to remember your schedule in your head.
4. Review often - My husband and I compare calendars every weekend for the upcoming week to make sure we remembered to invite each other to anything pertinent on our own schedules.   We use what is on our calendars to determine what types of food we should add to our grocery list.  Do we need crockpot meals or will we have time for meals that take more prep time?  We  verify we have all the kid-hauling covered and are able to attend any important family events.
5. Use alerts! - When you use the alerting feature on your calendar to really put your life to be on autopilot.  Set reminders far enough in advance to give you time to either prepare for your appointment or leave on time if you have to travel.  When you set recurring all day appointments with reminders for a few days ahead of time, you will never forget a birthday, anniversary or important event again!  

My motto is "If it's not on my calendar, it doesn't happen!"  This frees my mind and memory for more important tasks than just remembering where I'm supposed to be when!  ​

I like the addition of a physical calendar at home to visually display to my family what's going on for the month.  Use a ​ different color for each family member so they can quickly scan to see what appointments impact them.  Just as with your digital calendar, you have to be diligent with keeping it updated.  I look forward to filling in my cute chalkboard calendar  that I got on Etsy at the end of each month for the following month.  I use my digital calendar as my master and fill in the next 30 days for all to see.  Each evening, around dinner time, I take care of any changes on the calendar.  The first time that your calendar "doesn't speak the truth" will be the last time your family trusts it!  ​

I read a lot of blogs, articles, and books about productivity, and one of the top suggestions for success is developing habits and routines - specifically in the morning. 

Morning is a time of day I love to BE up and productive, but my problem is the GETTING up!  Many of the books say you should get up at 5 a.m., exercise, meditate, and never look at your phone.  Well... my mornings have almost always been the total opposite of that.  I've traditionally set the alarm for as late as possible to allow me a few snoozes and then scurry around until I'm all sweaty and it's a little past time to get in the car for my commute.

I've gone through spurts where I got up early and walked on the treadmill or did yoga or maybe even read an enriching book, but it never lasted much than a workweek. I'd look to other research to support my theory that maybe I'm just not a morning person.  The book The Power of When by Michael Breus is very interesting and suggests that each of us have a chronotype that dictates when we tend to perform the best.  Though there's truth that I might not naturally pop out of bed at 5 a.m. happy and looking fresh, work and school still start early in the day, so I've got to figure out how to embrace the morning!  I distinctly remember the feeling I had one crisp, fall day in college when I'd gotten up early to finish a paper and walked across campus to turn it in.  I closed my under-20-year-old eyes, breathed in the cool air, and thought, "It feels good to already be done with something this early in the morning."  I often think of what it felt like to breathe in that feeling of early morning achievement.  How do I get that feeling back?  How do I become consistent in early accomplishment?

Here's what I've come up with:

1.  Have Something You're Excited to Get Up For
​
THIS is where it's at! If you enjoy sleep more than you enjoy what you do in the mornings, obviously, it's going to be hard to get out of bed. Thinking back to that feeling I had of early morning accomplishment when I was in college - what I remember most was the beautiful, cool morning air.  I used to, very rarely, and only on a weekend, go out to my deck to read if I needed some alone time.  The weather had to be perfect, the angle of the sun had to be perfect, and the timing had to be perfect so there was no dew on my chair.  All three of those things aligned a few weeks ago, and I was enjoying my book and the sounds of the birds in my backyard.  I looked around me and saw the overgrown plants, the dusty table, and the leaf-covered boards of my deck.  I decided if I was feeling so calm and enjoying my book in the outside so much in the midst of that disaster, how great would I feel with pruned plants, a clean table and a swept deck?  I spent a few hours that day cleaning things up and vowed to sit outside every morning that week before work for at least a few minutes and do something I wanted to do - read, write in my journal, work on my blog, plan in my calendar, do a devotion, just sit and listen to the morning - whatever I wanted!  What a great week it was - I made progress on my e-book, I planned, I read, I smelled my flowers!  I'm not going to lie, there was a day that all I did was take two deep breaths of morning air and then headed back inside, but even on that day, I looked forward to getting outside, which made it much easier to get out of bed!

For me, getting outside coupled with having some dedicated time to do what I wanted to do was key! I did have to adapt to the dew on the chairs (a towel to sit on or a chair from inside brought out) and the humidity (not fixing my hair until after the outside time), but because I was excited about the time set aside accomplish my personal goals, I made it work! Now that I've made going outside in the mornings a habit, I'm going to try to get up a little earlier in the coming weeks to enjoy more of that time!  Winter in Indiana may prove a little difficult for outside time, but I plan to create a nook somewhere to stand in for my deck during the worst of the weather (though I'm not going to dwell on winter weather when I still have late summer and fall still to enjoy!)

2. Do what you want to -- and what you don't 

As excited as I am about my outside, alone time to do thing things I want to do, I'm still a mom, wife, homeowner, and employee, so everyday there are tasks that aren't necessarily making me jump up and down with joy.  But since I'm allowing myself that time to do what I want to do, it makes those other tasks not as bad.  Is there a really daunting task for work that  you could get a jump start on at home, do you need to start a load of laundry or maybe even scrub the toilet?  Pick at least one task that you don't care for (and it's ok if it's a tiny one) and just get it done!  You will feel so good that you've gotten it out of the way

​3. Plan ahead 

I wrote about this topic earlier this year, but I think it makes such a difference in a morning routine that I'll sum it up for you again.  Limit your morning decisions by picking out your outfit, and either pre-packing your lunchbox or at least having go-to snacks available to pack.  Use your phone to remind you of what you need to do on a specific morning or to alert you when it's time to get in the car!  I also like to time myself so I know exactly how long certain morning tasks take. 

​Multi-task!  Normally, I'd tell you single-tasking is a better bang for your buck, but in the morning, you can do a few things at once like let your hair dry while you put on your makeup.  Quit opening up the same cabinet over and over - plan your morning attack and be efficient!  Leave something in your home clean before you exit the house for the day - for me it's my bathroom counter, for others it's their made bed.  Give yourself a quick win to start the day feeling productive!  And finally, make a note of all the stuff floating in your head rather than trying to remember it.  A note on a piece of paper, a digital note on your phone, or even a voice memo, are all great ways to empty your head without worry of forgetting so you can focus on your morning routine.  (If you'd like to read to whole post about tips to avoid a mad rush morning, click here.)

4. Sleep
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It's really hard to get up early (and do it consistently) if you don't get enough sleep.  That's not a profound statement, just common sense.  In a previous post, I wrote about a really good day I had that began with a good night's sleep, so I wanted to figure out how to consistently get that kind of sleep to create more really good days!  I've found that stress has a huge impact on my sleep, so making my bedroom as calming as possible is a must!  Even if the rest of the house isn't clutter-free, I try to make sure my bedroom and bathroom are picked up.  A bedtime goal (mine is 10:30 - 11:00 p.m.) also helps, but I've found that one of the most important parts of getting a good night's rest is to go to bed before my husband.  Reading a physical book in bed to the light of my bedside lamp with the noise machine set on the rain sound makes me sleepy.   I use a specific scent of lotion every night (and only at night) right before I turn off the lamp to tell myself it's sleeping time!  I also prepare for whatever temperature I might want in the middle of the night.  If I start out with no socks, I have a pair on my bedside table.  I have headache medicine in my bedside drawer and some water within arm's reach just in case.  The quicker I take care of small nighttime nuisances, the more sleep I can get.  My sleep goal is 7-8 hours per night.  I track it with my fit bit, and normally am just shy of 7, so I've got some room for improvement!

5.  Don't compare 

Who cares if you haven't run three miles or read a chapter of a personal development book or made your family a hot breakfast? Morning routines are about YOU, not everyone else.  Like I admitted earlier, my personal, outside time on some days is literally just breathing!  What matters to me is that I'm up, I'm motivated, and I'm growing.  I don't share my ideas and experiences with you so that you feel bad about yourself for not doing exactly the same, I'm sharing them so you can feel inspired or motivated to find your own, personal morning routine that works for you!  As much as I wish I loved exercising and could check that off my to-do list before 8 a.m., it's probably never going to be part of my morning routine (because I will continue to be red-faced and sweaty even post-shower for hours after any level of physical exertion!)  So, you know what?  I'm ok with my own routine that may not fit the "ideal" because it fits me! 

I encourage you to find what works for you and stick with it for at least 3 weeks to determine if it's going to move the needle.  I could see positive change after just one workweek of going outside in the mornings, but one workweek does not a habit make - keep it up!  I would love to hear what you find as the key to your morning - share with us in the comments or on the Facebook page!

​I've been planning to write an e-book for about a year.  I'd get super excited about it, dreaming about all the people that I might be able to give just a little bit of help or encouragement, and then I'd start doubting myself.  I came up with excuses why I couldn't or shouldn't put my content out there for the world to read, and I just plain procrastinated!  Fear of failure and rejection set in, and I put that goal aside.

Well, this week, I decided I'm going to just start and not in a "someday I'll publish this" way, but in a hard core, 6 week sprint with a for real deadline kind of way!  This spring, I listened to Natalie Eckdahl on her Biz Chix podcast talk about hitting your next goal in just 6 weeks, and I got excited.  She told success stories, and I was sure I could do it!  But soon, the excuses started again as I looked at my calendar and realized there was a vacation coming up in the next 6 weeks, and that would just throw a wrench in things. The next time I thought about it, there was something else on the calendar in the following 6 weeks, and I was a little relieved to have another "reason" not to start.

Choosing not to proceed - not to challenge myself - limited me and made me feel inadequate.  I really believe this began a vicious cycle that caused me to began procrastinating on all sorts of other things.  Not only was I not accomplishing my goals, I was feeling guilty and weighed down by all that was undone.  A good friend recently gave me some great advice.  She said to pick one thing that I could finish that day, just one.  I did it, and you know what finishing just one little thing did for me?  It gave me momentum to want to do more and more!  In Brian Tracy's book, Eat That Frog!: 21 Great Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time, he shares about the old saying: 'if you eat a live frog first thing each morning, you'll have the satisfaction of knowing that it's probably the worst thing you'll do all day.'  Use the frog as a metaphor for that thing that you know you should do and that you know you'll feel better when you've done - and just start!

There's no magic formula, but here's what I'm doing.  Would you like to join me and do your own sprint to accomplish that thing that you've been putting off?  You can download a FREE worksheet here, but please read on for some suggestions.
​
Start TODAY! 
Don't wait for a Monday or the first of the month or when things slow down at work or when the kids start school -  start TODAY!

Announce your goal to at least one other person
​If you keep your goal to yourself, it's all too easy to continue procrastinating.  Once you share it with even one other person, your chances of meeting your goal go up significantly.  The American Society of Training and Development reports that chances of success increase by 65% when you commit to completing it to one other person and chances go up to 95% when you check in regularly to report on your progress.  I am currently doing a 5 day Infinite Growth Challenge hosted by Pinterest Marketing Strategist, Rachel Ngom, and one of the daily assignments was to post in the Facebook group - for all to see - what the one thing you need to do even though you're scared to do it.  I shared that I'm going to write my e-book, and now I feel accountable to the others participating in the challenge to get it done!

Commit to make forward progress (however small) EVERY day!
How big your goal is will determine how much you have to do every day, but don't let a day go by without some action.  Create a chain that you promise yourself you won't break.  6 weeks is only 42 days - you can do this for 42 days!!  Set aside a time each day where you will record your progress and adjust your plan.  I've been spending 5-10 minutes on my deck in the mornings making my notes.

Plan backwards
Start by thinking about what success will look like.  That's where you want to be at the end of week 6.  My goal is to publish an e-book by September 11, 2019 (which just happens to be My Life In Order's 2 year anniversary!)  Now work backwards on what you have to do to get there, starting with weekly goals.   Here are my weekly plans thinking with the end in mind:

• Week 6: Publish and promote
• Week 5: Edit and format
• Week 4: Seek feedback
• Week 3: Write and format
• Week 2: Write!
• Week 1: Market research, finalize topic, research process

I've decided to make out daily goals a week at a time.  For example, this week looks like this:

• Day 1: Establish weekly goals, commit publicly
• Day 2: Gather materials from previous presentations
• Day 3: Survey blog readers about topics and pricing
• Day 4: Locate "how to write and publish and e-book" training materials
• Day 5: Review training materials
• Day 6: Review previous presentation materials 
• Day 7: Review survey results and decide on topic

Next week, I'll make daily goals around actually writing!  

​ DO IT!!!
Now the hard part, actually do the thing!  Here is a FREE printable I've created to help you be successful.  Please share with us in the comments on this post or on the Facebook page what big things you will be accomplishing in 6 weeks!  You've got this!!  I'll be sharing with you my weekly progress on social media (so be sure to follow me on Facebook and Instagram) and I'd love to hear about your weekly progress, too.  If you'd rather not share with everyone, feel free to email me at info@mylifeinorder.com .

​
​Will you help me with my research by completing a 1 minute survey?  Click here!  And, if you want to be one of the first to know when the e-book is available, sign up below!

Sources:

Wissman, Barrett. “An Accountability Partner Makes You Vastly More Likely to Succeed.” Entrepreneur, 20 Mar. 2018, www.entrepreneur.com/article/310062.

Eckdahl, Natalie. “Hit Your Next Goal With a Six Week Sprint.” Biz Chix, 28 Mar. 2019, bizchix.com/363-hit-your-next-goal-with-a-six-week-sprint/.

Photo by Kaitlyn Baker on Unsplash

In less than an hour before you leave for your trip, you can save yourself five times as much time when you get back.  If your company uses Outlook and your email goes through a Microsoft Exchange server (as opposed to a mail provider like Gmail or Yahoo!), you can literally process your emails when you're far, far away and Outlook isn't even running!   It's easy - just open Outlook, and click on "File" in the menu bar in the upper left of the screen.  Choose "Automatic Replies," and after you've selected the dates and created templates for your replies, click on the "Rules " button - this is where it gets really cool!  Here you can create nearly endless rules to automatically delete, move or forward messages based on a variety of criteria like who sent it, who it was sent to, the subject, etc.  The rules run and take care of your messages automatically, so that even if your "no email on vacation willpower" fails you and you pull up email on your phone, those messages will already be taken care of.

If you use Outlook with a mail provider like Gmail or Yahoo!, you can create rules but they just won't run until you open Outlook, and you'll need to manually turn them on and off.  Just click on the "Rules" icon on the "Home" tab and then select "Manage Rules & Alerts."   If you use something other than Outlook, don't despair, you can create similar rules, too! ​

As you go through the next few steps I'm going to outline for you, this folder will be a holding tank for your later to do's.  To make it very easy to quickly move items to this folder, set yourself a Quick Step.  When a message is selected in the Inbox view, you can simply click on the Move to "Vacation Review" Quick Step to immediately move it out of your Inbox and into this folder.  

Here's how to create a Quick Step in Outlook:

1. On the "Home" tab in Outlook, click on the down arrow for more options in the Quick Steps menu
2. Click "New Quick Step," then select "Move To Folder..."
3. Name your Quick Step something like "Move to Vacation Review"
4. Choose Your "Vacation Review" folder from the drop down and if you'd like to automatically mark messages you process with the Quick Step as read, check the "Mark as Read" checkbox.
5. Click Finish
6. Now you will see your new option in the Quick Step box.  
7. To rearrange the order of your Quick Steps, click on the down arrow for more options and select "Manage Quick Steps"
8. Select the Quick Step you want to relocate, click on the up or down arrows until it is in the location you want, then click "OK"

Expand one group at a time, skipping the group of emails sent only to you - you'll handle these in the next step.  Quickly scan to decide if you can delete the whole group, and if so - go for it!  If you think that there may be something you need in that group,  get a closer look at an individual message without opening it by turning on a reading pane.  Click on the View tab and choose your favorite reading pane location.  

As you review individual emails, don't get distracted and try to do anything! You have three choices: 1. Delete (use your keyboard delete key or the delete icon), 2. Move to "Vacation Review" folder, or 3. Archive (move into your existing folder structure. To read my suggestions on a simple folder structure for email read Email Organization: Part 1.)  The only other thing I'm going to give you permission to do at this point is to unsubscribe before deleting if it's an email list you no longer want to be part of.

Now you should be left with emails that were sent only to you.  To make it easier to review, drag the "To" field back down to the Inbox grid, then follow the rules above to group, but this time right click on the "From" field.  You will instantly recognize if a sender is spam or one that you need to pay attention to.  Just like before, as you review individual emails using the reading pane, resist the urge to do anything.  Just choose from the same three choices as above: ​1. Delete 2. Move to "Vacation Review" folder, or 3. Archive.  Remember you're allowed to unsubscribe before you delete since that will help you have fewer emails next vacation.

Now your inbox should be completely empty - unless you've gotten some messages while working through this process.  It's ok to leave those few, unread messages in your Inbox for now.  The Inbox is for new, incoming messages, and your Vacation Review folder is for your backlog of things to get done.  Now you have a way to see clear progress as you get caught up.  

​Make sure your "Vacation Review" folder is set to conversation mode.  Just go to the "View" tab and check the "Show as Conversations" checkbox.  In the "Conversations Settings" drop down, make sure "Show Messages from Other Folders" is selected.

At the beginning of the year, I reflected on my past year and set a few goals for myself. One of the goals I had for my blog was to do a guest post on another productivity blogger's site. I'm proud to announce that I can check that one off of my list!

I was honored when Csaba Vadadi-Fulop, a fellow productivity lover who blogs at www.productivity95.com asked if I'd be interested in collaborating. We met while participating in the 10 Steps to Ultimate Productivity book launch team. I published one of Csaba's posts on my blog in March about Productivity and Parenting, and this week, a post I wrote was featured on his blog, Productivity 9 to 5!

Please check out my post about Workplace Productivity in Real Life, and while you're at it, check out Csaba's free Productivity95 Manifesto - a kick-ass guide to supercharge your productivity.

Now I’m feeling motivated to crush a couple other of my goals - writing an eBook, hosting a webinar, and developing some productivity products! Stay tuned....

Everyone has a junk drawer (or maybe more than one!)  and most are filled with, well, junk!  Maybe we should rename it a 'miscellaneous drawer' to remind us that this drawer doesn't have to be a cluttered mess.  I'm in the midst of a kitchen remodel (read more about that here) so I had a great opportunity to rethink my junk drawer.  In my previous cabinets, I actually had about 4 junk drawers, and though they looked fairly organized, there was just too much stuff!  I consolidated everything into one large drawer and curated the contents to be only the items that didn't already have a home elsewhere.  

2. Get rid of what you haven't used in the past 3 months
​Maybe last time you went through your junk drawer, you were really into gum, but since you've settled on hard candy.  It's ok to throw away your gum if you're never going to chew it!  I keep small packages of tissues in this drawer, but whenever I pull out a package, I never choose one that isn't full, so I ended up with about 6 partial packages taking up precious drawer space.  Instead of throwing these away, I took them all and put them in my car's console so they will get used up.

3. Relocate items that have a home elsewhere
I had two containers of toothpicks in my junk drawer, but I moved them to my kitchen cabinets where I stored the other box of toothpicks I'd recently bought because I'd forgotten there were some in my junk drawer!  I also moved tea lights and votive candles to the drawer near my wax warmer where I keep all my scented waxes.    I moved some small tools to my tool box and masking tape to my laundry room cabinet where I keep packing tape.  

4. Group like items together
I used to have one container for rubber bands, paperclips, and twistie ties.  I could never find a paperclip when I wanted one because they were hidden among all of the other items.  I've now separated these things into two separate containers so now it's much easier to find what I want when I want it!

5. Get creative with drawer organizers
You can use pretty much anything for drawer organizers - products specifically for organizing drawers can be found at most stores, but you could also use dollar store plastic containers, small tins, small cardboard boxes, etc.  Remember that size is key, you want enough room in each compartment for what you want to store there, but not too much space causing you to waste precious junk drawer real estate! I found some inexpensive drawer organizers at TJ Maxx, but they didn't have any very small compartments, so I nested some smaller organizers right inside, and viola, I had just what I needed.  

Last week, I realized it was time to embrace that being a small part of something big is enough.  As I pondered what this meant in my real life here's what I came up with:

• Passion matters more than being seen

If I'm passionate about the small part I'm best at, I can make a significant contribution to the whole, even if that's not the part others will see or remember.  I don't need recognition, just the knowledge that I did my best in an area that I really cared about.

• I can't know it all, and no one else can either

I hope I'm not alone in feeling like everyone else must know more than I do.  In fact, I surmise, that I know a similar amount to others, but we just know and excel at different things.  

• What if's about the past don't help, but what if's about the future empower

When I ask myself over and over what if I would have done this or that in the past, my focus is compromised, but when I ask what if I do this or that in the future, I can decide what my focus should be going forward.

• I can create momentum through focus

That word, focus, is one that I want more of!  I've often felt like a "jack of all trades, master of none."  Choosing a small amount of things to focus on would help propel me forward.

• Feeling overwhelmed doesn't diminish your worth

We all have a purpose and value.  (Say that  to yourself a few times!)  

• I don't have to be a leader all the time

"You're a natural born leader," they say.  What I want them to say is, "It's ok to follow sometimes."

​What about you?  Do you feel like you have to be on top to matter or have you already mastered the art of teamwork and honing your specific skills so that you can compliment others with a common, big-picture goal?  I'd love to hear from you.  Comment below or email info@mylifeinorder.com.

My husband and I have been talking about a kitchen remodel for years, and when the doors to our cabinets literally began to fall off, we knew it was time!  We are still a ways from a final product, but I'm very happy with how the process has gone so far.  I planned more for this project than any other home improvement project, and it's been worth it!  

What I've learned so far:

• Start WAY in advance

Home improvement projects always take longer than expected, so start much earlier than you think is necessary.   A kitchen may be the most difficult of all remodeling projects and the timelines are longer than I ever would have expected.  5-6 weeks for cabinets to get in and ANOTHER 4-5 weeks for counter tops once cabinets are installed seems extreme, but once you know what to expect, you can begin the planning process.

• Ask lots of questions

Do your research!  Ask professionals and, more importantly, friends who have been through a similar project.  Ask for your family's input, too.  They will be the ones living with you in the space, so you want to make sure it's functional for them as well.  Things you want to learn about are style, color, materials, functionality, and durability.  

• Visualize the final product

Look at magazines, watch some home improvement shows, browse home home improvement stores, and of course create some Pinterest boards to help plan out your final design.  When you have a design in your mind, it's easier to make all the choices required for a remodeling project.

• Make your temporary space work for you

When you are remodeling a section of your home, it's an inconvenience not matter how you slice it.  Take a little extra time to set up the necessities in another area in your home.  Our family has been using our breezeway between the kitchen and garage as our temporary kitchen complete with our fridge, microwave, toaster oven and kitchen table.  Yeah, I washed dishes in my bathroom for a couple of weeks, but other than running water, I had everything I needed!

• ​Do first things first

Based on all the questions you asked earlier, you should know the pieces of the project that take the most time.  Make yourself a timeline so you don't have to put your project on hold or have your house torn up longer than necessary.  For example, we took measurements first, then found our installer which allowed us to get his input on materials and be aware of his availability.  Next we ordered cabinets so they would be delivered in the right window of time.  We knew we need to have our cabinets torn out, floor repaired and floor installed first, and we didn't want to have a kitchen's worth of cabinets taking up our garage space for longer than necessary.  

• Find the right person to do the work

Some of you are able to do home improvement projects on your own...and then there's the rest of us!  Finding someone who does quality work when they say the will do it at a reasonable price is one of the hardest parts of home ownership.  This is why asking around to others who have been through the same type of project you're doing is so valuable! Learn from their experience (and their failures!)  and ask for and take recommendations.  

• Be willing to wait for quality

Along the way, there are going to be surprises (especially if you live in an old house like mine!)  Try not to get frustrated if your well-laid plans get pushed back.  It's more important that the job get done right than get done fast.  Make sure to plan in some "fluff" time so that you don't end up having the painter scheduled to paint on the same day your counter tops are being installed because the cabinet installation was delayed due to unexpected issues with the floor.  If you build in some buffer days, your project will flow much more smoothly!

• Don't forget progress pictures!

It's so much fun to see those progress pictures.  It helps you appreciate how far you've come even when the project seems to be going slow.  When I look back at my green linoleum and what was under it, I'm even more grateful for my new, level floor!  We have a few more weeks before we can call the project complete, but we've come a long way!

I took a spring break from my blog.  I'll be honest - for these past couple of weeks, I didn't know what to write because I've been feeling very "out of order,"  and I felt a little like a fraud for even having this blog when I felt so out of control.  Control, that's a little word that seems to cause me so much trouble!

Last Sunday at church, was the first time in a while that I felt like it was ok to just sit and be.  I was allowed not to worry, not to feel guilty about all I should be doing, and didn't feel inadequate for the things I've been trying so hard to do and not succeeding at.  I was reminded that most of the minutia of my life, in the grand scheme of things, isn't really a big deal.  The things that ARE a big deal, well, I can't really change the outcome in any way by worrying or fixating on them. The Bible verse, "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?" from Luke 1225 is so true, so simple, and yet so hard to put into practice!  

Like so many of you, I'm a faithful This Is Us watcher, and a couple of episodes ago, Randall and Beth were shown as young parents, playing the "what's the worst that could happen" game.  I loved the reminder that even though there are always bad possibilities, the likelihood that they are going to happen is very slim, so it's not worth my energy to worry about them.  ​

Most of us have had times in our lives where we wake up with a sick feeling in the pit of our stomachs thinking about what could happen today, and sometimes we convince ourselves ahead of time that we know what the outcome will be.  I've learned through experience that there are two things I definitely can NOT do and those are predict the future or go back in time.   Because I can't do those things, I'm trying to make it a habit to focus only on what I can control and not what I can't.  It helps me to actually write out a list of each.   When I spend my time on what I can control, it makes it easier not to fret about the rest.  I realize now that being out of control is ok, is natural and once I accept it, can actually be freeing!

I found that the number of things  I can control is much less that what I cannot.  But that's what makes it manageable!  My general list of what I can control is just this:

• my bedtime and time I get up in the morning
• food that goes into my mouth
• words that come out of my mouth and my tone of voice
• if I wear a smile or a scowl
• the content of the written messages I send 
• the time I spend working vs. time spent (distraction free) with my family
• how much I move
• how much I read vs time I spend on a screen
• what I think about
• how I react
• how I plan ahead

I'm making it a new practice during my weekly review, to write down how I want these areas of my life to look in the next week.  Give it a try yourself! For example, this week I looked at my calendar of commitments and responsibilities and decided I could CONTROL going to bed by 10:30 and getting up at 6 this week, and I could CONTROL the snacks I pack in my lunchbox, and I could CONTROL going on a walk during my kids' sports practices this week, etc.  

I'm a real life pinball machine.  I feel that little ball pinging around inside of me.  There are flashes of light competing for my attention, and I'm constantly pounding on the buttons that control the flippers to keep the ball from escaping the course.  There are times I can remain focused, keep my eye on the ball and keep it from being lost.  I feel proud of being in the groove and seeing my 'score' going up and up.  But just when it seems like I've figured out this game called life, somehow I level up, and now instead of one ball to keep track of, there are two.  And so it repeats until the pinballs have multiplied and become unmanageable and overwhelming.  As my stress level increases, I can feel them in my chest, and I have to remind myself to stop and breathe.  My head doesn't stop considering all of the demands and expectations.  They are ever present - even in my sleep.   I want to stop pounding the flippers and just let all of them slide, unopposed, down the chute. That would allow me to start a new game, a fresh one, where it's really possible to keep track of my responsibilities.

Rather than quit, we need to come up with strategies to make us better.  Here are four ideas to get you started:

1.  Recognize why you are overwhelmed
Are you always "on", always connected?  Are you saying yes too often?  Do you avoid delegating?  Do you over promise or set unrealistic deadlines?  If you answered yes to these, try disconnecting some of the time, saying no, sharing the load and giving yourself some margin!

2.  Remove distractions
When you try to do too much, it's easy to try to multi-task to get it all done.  When we try to do more than one thing at once, what we're really doing is building in distractions for ourselves.  Work on short bursts of real focus.  Try the Pomodoro Technique where you work without a break for a period of time, and then get up and away from your work for a short break time.   Turn off notifications or even (gasp) close your email and instant messaging programs for a while so you are not tempted to check for incoming messages.  If you work from home, designate an area that is your "office" and use that space only for working.

3.  Take a break
Take short breaks like described above during working hours, but also consider taking a longer break from some responsibilities.  It may be time to prune your schedule to allow for some free time in your week.  Scheduling time to do nothing does not mean you are a slacker!  Consider an actual vacation where you can really disconnect from your day to day responsibilities including the technology that ties you to them.

4. Practice 
Practice really does make perfect.  If there's something you want to accomplish, you have to get better over time.  Learn from your mistakes, and systematically improve.  Make lists, read books, seek advice from those who have been successful already.

I'm excited to share a very special post from my first guest blogger, Csaba Vadadi-Fulop from www.productivity95.com.   I met Csaba when we were both part of the 10 Steps to Ultimate Productivity book launch team.  He has great content on his blog, and in this post he shares tips on remaining productive while parenting.

Productivity and Parenting 
By Csaba Vadadi-Fulop

When your baby is born, a lifelong odyssey begins. You quickly realize that you must harness your down time more than ever before. Maybe you experience a paradigm shift in your life in terms of how you perceive your world: you might be more selective in what's important and what isn't. Both happened to me.
 
You, however, can't prepare for having a newborn―no matter what people say. But you can make significant adjustments to your life both before and after the birth of your baby and that's the topic I want to discuss in this post.
 
By the end of this post, hopefully, you'll get valuable insight about how you can channel your life back into order.
 
 
Adjusting Your Lifestyle
 
It goes without saying that you'll likely develop sleep debt, exercise debt, and the like. What's less obvious, though, is that it's much more than time. It's about your space-time continuum. The arrival of a baby and the events downstream will consume your space and time in a non-linear fashion.
 
It's beyond the scope of this post to discuss nursing, psychology, time management, and the like. Nor am I capable of giving such advice. I just want to share with you how becoming a parent literally changed my life in terms of how I operate on a daily level.
 
First, it forced me to switch from the PC to a MacBook. I've flirted with the idea for years, but it was the birth of my baby when I realized that the PC simply consumes too much space, cables are in mesh, and I have less flexibility to work. The MacBook was a game-changer. I was able to work practically everywhere at any time with the comfort of a king.
 
Second, when I purchased my wireless headphones I quickly discovered that I won't miss my loudspeakers anymore. I can listen to inspiring podcasts or my favorite band and take care of my duties, simultaneously. Washing the dishes, taking out the garbage, lifting my dumbbells? No problem, I just put on my magic headphones―with my iPhone laying on the kitchen table (!)―and my favorite podcast is with me all the time, regardless of whether I'm in the bathroom, bedroom, or yard. And my baby would still be sleeping or wondering what the heck dad wears on his shiny head.
 
Luckily I switched to consuming eBooks a couple of years ago, and I can say it was a good deal. EBooks don't take up any place; they're sitting in the cloud (Kindle cloud, by the way). So I can reserve some shelves for the storybooks dedicated to my little baby.
 
I've been extraordinarily resistant to changes for years including those related to the above-mentioned (portable device, headphones, eBooks). I always had an excuse―be it finance, reluctance, or fear―preventing me from diving into new things. Having a child is a perfect time to say no to your reluctant self!
 
Let's discuss the tech side of all those changes a little bit...
 
 
Adjusting Your Techniques
 
I use Nozbe as my task manager that's highly flexible to keep my life in order. I created a Baby project in Nozbe to home tasks that are related to parenting. When my wife was in the hospital with our newborn, I made a grocery-like checklist in Nozbe to ensure that I buy and deliver to the hospital everything my new family needed.
 
It was a highly demanding period: the born of your baby is psychologically demanding itself; on top of that you're supposed to take care of a lot of things, including the certificates of your baby, among others. Nozbe was a great partner in this period, too.
 
Later on, I kept important deadlines in Nozbe about vaccination and the like.
 
I still have my Baby project with a traveling checklist, recurring tasks such as weight recording, and more. This project will never end. Maybe I’ll rename it to, say, "Parenting" for the next twenty years.
 
It's one thing that you keep your tasks in a trusted system, another thing is finding a system to organize your notes.
 
Evernote is the note-taking app that I use on a daily basis to record and keep my notes, clip articles, save my journal entries, and the list is almost endless. I keep a lot of parenting related stuff in Evernote: baby first aid guides, nursing guides, weight journal, notes from the pediatrician, consultation hours, screenshots of diapers and medications, and much more.
 
Keeping a record of the baby's weight is a must. I created automation on my iPhone with the Workflow app: each week when my wife and I are recording the baby's weight, I just push a button on my home screen, enter the weight, and it will automatically appear in my Evernote weight journal with the appropriate date and time.
 
Sounds good? I still have much to improve...
 
 
Future Commitments
 
There's always a place to improve and adjust your productivity system.
 
Selecting the clothes that I like the most is still ahead. The rest is best to go for a charity that will open up a lot of space in my wardrobe. But, again, it goes beyond space: it will free up mental space for me.
 
Integrating regular exercise into my weekly routine is another challenge: I want to fight off this challenge with immersing into different new sports and picking the one I like the most. Without feeling anticipation, it's hard to build a long-lasting habit.
 
It's my sincere hope that you got some ideas and motivation to adjust to dad life (or mom life). Parenting is a lifetime commitment; productivity is a never-ending journey: why not combine the two for multiple outcomes?

A while back, I wrote about my struggle with my weight, and I'm still working on it!  I have a trip coming up in a couple of months which is a great motivator for me to set a goal and crush it!  I've been trying to figure out how to keep track of my progress and while also setting myself up for success.  

Research says habits are broken down into three parts:

1. Triggers
2. Actions
3. Rewards

Identifying triggers can help us to avoid them or come up with strategies to cope with them.  I've always thought my triggers were stress and free food, but what I've been noticing is that the lack of a plan or accountability seems to be what really gets me in trouble.  

I don't know about you, but I'm really good at rewarding myself, but I struggle to find a reward that is appropriate and doesn't undermine my intended outcome.  For example, I often feel like when I've lost some weight, I "deserve" a milk shake or a candy bar or some jalapeno poppers!  I think the reason I feel like I've earned some "bad" food is because I've felt deprived during the short stint of weight loss.  ​

I've been brainstorming a way to help address my triggers and my feelings of deprivation.  I ran across James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, who says that the first step to successfully developing a habit is to make one so small it's almost impossible fail.  I like the idea of not failing, so I decided to give this miniature habit thing a try.  I chose just one thing to focus on for a very short time period of time.

I saw an intriguing idea on Pinterest about tracking habits with a very simple chart with dates for an entire month listed down the left side of the paper and habits across the top.  This would create squares that could be colored in to indicate completion of a task.  Using different colors to indicate different actions gives a quick visual representation of your actions.  I decided to create my own chart, and even though I fantasize about producing a beautiful bullet journal (and maintain a Pinterest board about it), I took a shortcut and created a printable that I could just color in.  My chart is a little different, and instead of various habits across the top, I listed the hours in the day to help me see patterns in my eating throughout the day.

I wanted to track one goal at a time, every day and see my progress in small increments - as small as every hour.  Each hour, I can color in the corresponding box with either green (I did good), red (I did bad) or blank  (I didn't do anything related to my goal.)  Then over just a few days, I can quickly see how I'm doing and if there are any particular days or times of days that are tripping me up.  By focusing only on one goal, I am much more likely to be successful, and then I can eventually add additional goals after my first one has become a true habit. 

My first goal was to avoid white flour.  I tracked my progress for the last few days of February, and the picture above is  how I did.  What I noticed was that by focusing only on one goal, I didn't feel deprived and thus didn't feel the need to reward myself with food for a job well done nearly as much as I had during previous weight loss efforts.  I also noticed that even though I was focusing on only one goal, it made me very conscious of my other food choices, and I ate better overall than I normally did.  I love being able to look at my chart and immediately be able to tell that I have a good breakfast and morning snack routine going, but I eat lunch at all sorts of different times, and my problem time is evening and late nights!  The jury is still out if this plan will work for me long term, but I'm excited to give it a try.  Who knows, maybe this will work so well I'll eventually add in some exercise to the mix!  

​Check out the free Habit Tracker printable, and give it a try!  You can come up with your own color system and make it as elaborate or as simple as you'd like. ​ Print out just one or use multiples as you add to your goals and habits. I will be reporting back before my trip in May to let you know how this system is working for me.  I'd love to hear from you if you test out this system and would especially like to see pictures if you draw a really pretty one in your bullet journal!

Sources

Quora. “The Science Behind Adopting New Habits (And Making Them Stick).” Forbes, Forbes Magazine, 13 Feb. 2018, www.forbes.com/sites/quora/2018/02/13/the-science-behind-adopting-new-habits-and-making-them-stick/#4f1430e843c7.

Clear, James. Atomic Habits: An Easy and Proven Way to Build Good Habits and Break Bad Ones. Cornerstone, 2019.

​

Music doesn't only make me cry, it inspires me.  There are all sorts of music - some with lyrics that would make you blush, some that only sound good with a major twang, and some with a better beat than melody.  I love all that this abstract thing we call music is - music is math, it’s art, it’s emotion, and it’s everywhere! Music brings people together, transforms us, allows us to express what’s deep inside, and displays God’s perfect design.    

2.  Set an alarm you can't ignore (or two)  
I used to be a serial snoozer.  I could hit a traditional alarm clock's snooze button every 9 minutes for a good hour before finally rolling out of bed.  I tried using my Fit Bit as an alternative and set multiple alarms that would vibrate until I turned them off.  That worked better, but I soon learned, I can turn them off in my sleep!  I think I may have found the best solution for me - I have been setting an alarm on my Google Mini and when it goes off it the morning, I have to actually speak to turn it off, "Hey Google, cancel alarm."  Even if I don't get out of bed immediately, having to talk out loud seems to wake me up enough so I don't fall back asleep. ​  I like setting backup alarms to make sure I'm out of bed in time.  Additional alarms throughout the morning can also keep you on track - try an "it's time for breakfast" alarm, an "it's time to dry my hair alarm", or an "it's time to load the car" alarm.  Remember all those little things you do in the morning that could be wasting time - like checking email or social media on your phone or watching the news.  If you want to build those into your morning, give yourself a set time so you don't get carried away!

5.  Limit the number of times you open doors and drawers
I try to only open a drawer or a door twice a morning - once to get out what I need and a second time to put those things away.  I open my top bathroom vanity drawer to get out my contacts, my hairbrush, and my makeup bag.  Then I close the drawer and don't open it again until I'm done with all of those items.  I open the door under my vanity to get out my curling iron and/or hair dryer and hair products, and then I close it.  I don't open it again until I'm ready to put those away and while I have it open I spritz myself with body spray before closing the door for the final time.  

6.  Put things away as you go
I like to wake up to a clear bathroom counter and leave for work with a clear bathroom counter.  It allows me to start the day with a little control.  When you do your makeup, try taking out all the items you will use out and set on the counter.  As you use them, put them back in a makeup bag, so when you're done, everything is back in your bag and it's easy to just put it back in its place.  Try a heat proof bag or container for curling irons or straighteners, so you can put them away as soon as you're done instead of leaving cords all over the place!  Keep a wastebasket next to where you get ready so you can throw away cotton swabs, tissues, cotton balls, etc. as you go.

7. Empty your head
Whenever you think of something you need to do, either write it down in a place you will see before you walk out the door or set a reminder on your phone that will create a notification so you can feel confident you won't forget.  If I need to take food for a carry in or return a library book or drop my car off at the repair shop, I set a reminder for early that morning so that when I look at my phone before I walk out the door, I'll see the notification.  This helps me sleep better not trying to remember what I have to do in the morning.  I also set reminders at times all throughout the day for things I need to buy, errands I need to run, phone calls I need to make, etc.  It's nice to get them out of my head and into a system I trust.  

I've said it many times before, I'm not great with time, which is why I try to come up with systems and habits to help me.  I'm not going to lie and say I'm never late or I always have a calm morning, but these few tips have helped me greatly reduce the amount of mad rush mornings!  ​

Now that my youngest is in 2nd grade, I think this year will be the first where neither kid has any doubt that their admirer is their mom, but I don't care, I'm still going all out! If you want to do something similar for your kids (or friend or significant other) here are the basics:

• Decide how many days you are going to give gifts. I usually choose 7 days, but it may be fun to do it longer (and don't feel bad if you can only make it happen a couple of days!)
• Purchase or make small gifts for each day. I hit up the dollar store or dollar bins for little trinkets. Some examples of items I've purchased are balloons, stickers, mini toys, notebooks, small stuffed animals, candy, snacks, books, and Valentine's socks. I've also made handmade cards, written little poems, drawn pictures or made cookies. I like to include a note with something I love about the kids along with each day’s surprise.
• Decide on a 'reveal' gift. I usually pick something a little larger for the day I announce that it is indeed me, their mama, who has been showering them with gifts. This year they are getting a larger piece of candy and a t-shirt. I got them t-shirts last year, and I was just noticing this week how often my youngest wears that Hogwarts tee from last Valentine's Day, so I decided on a repeat!
• Plan out how the gifts will be delivered. You could go as easy as setting items on the kitchen table at night before you go bed, leaving them at your back door, hiding them in the house, or you could really throw your kids off your trail by mailing them! This year, I put each day's item in an envelope marked with their name and the date it should be opened and put all of those envelopes inside a giant bubble mailer, and one evening, I'll bring it in as if it were dropped off at our house. I'm excited at the anticipation it will bring when they open the package see all the envelopes! I did not include the 'reveal' gift in this envelope, but instead got a very glittery gift bag to give each kid before school on Valentine’s Day including a card explaining that I'm their not-so-secret admirer.
• Enjoy! It’s a lot of fun to make someone else’s day, especially if it’s someone you love!

It's easy to let your medicine cabinet get out of control - as long as you can shut the doors, you can ignore whatever is going on in there, right?! You can become blind to your own clutter, or so overwhelmed by it that you don't even use your medicine cabinet anymore. I was tired of the fear that all of the expired medicine would fall on me and annoyed that I felt like I was running out of space in my bathroom. This weekend, I did a major medicine cabinet purge in both of my bathrooms and then made a trip to one of my favorite stores, Dollar General, to stock up on a few items that would fit in the narrow cabinets and provide the organization I was looking for. Here are 5 items that you might not think of using in your medicine cabinet that can help you get organized and only cost a few bucks!

1.  Plastic Cups
​I needed some vertical storage, so I looked for some tall plastic cups.  I found 4 for $1!  Make sure to measure your shelves first and measure the diameter of the bottom AND top of the cup to make sure you can close the door all the way.  I used cups to store an entire bag of cough drops, tubes of toothpaste, small bottles of lotion, and my husband's electric trimmer.  To make it easy (dare I say foolproof) for my family, I labelled the cups!  I like the idea of cups because if they get gross, they can be popped in the dishwasher!​

2. Drawer Organizers
I bought a set of modular drawer organizers and was able to use the small and medium sizes in my cabinets (I used the large ones in my vanity drawers so they didn't go to waste!) I put things like nail clippers, first aid ointments, and bottles of medicines in these organizers and added a label as well!

3. Small, plastic food storage containers
I found a 3 pack of food storage containers for a great deal. I didn't need the lids, but the oblong size was perfect. I like clear storage so you can see what you're getting. This is especially helpful for top shelves. Consider taking items out of their original packaging to store in a more accessible way. I emptied all the adhesive bandages out of their cardboard boxes and separated into large and small sizes (and of course, labelled the containers!) I also emptied out flossers into one of these containers. Since there is a wide mouth opening, it is more likely that my kids will grab one and actually floss their teeth than if they had to get them from the original package.
​

4. Command hooks
I got a set of Command hooks for the inside of one of the doors and used them to hang a razor. My door has an inset area that was perfect to tuck the razor in! You could even hang toothbrushes or tubes of toothpaste with a binder clip attached to the end of the tube. Take note of where your shelves are situated to make sure there is room for the items you want to hang from inside the door. I also like to tape a little inspiration on the inside of my doors - a sweet note from my kids and a picture of me at my ideal weight!

5. Small decorative candle holder
I found adorable little lantern shaped glass tea light candle holders that were just shallow enough to fit in my cabinets for a dollar each! I used them for our thermometers. Because the container is glass, it won't tip over. I used the second one for a few of my random items I use on a daily basis.

My medicine cabinets look a little bare right now because I purged so many expired items.  I have a short list of the things I want to replace, but now I have plenty of space and a plan for where each item will go.  Just as with every area that you organize, it is important to purge first, determine the best location for what you have left, and then purchase or repurpose storage solutions specific to your own needs!  

I cracked open my brand new journal on my birthday this week.  My first entry is titled "38 Things I Want to Accomplish While I'm 38."  Last year, I wrote down one less goal for a 37 year-old's version of this list.  I made the list with various types of goals - some fun, some frivolous, some personal, some professional, some physical, some spiritual, but all just for me.  I made some easy and some a real challenge.  I was thrilled to mark off one of them very early in the year - I beat my husband at chess!  Sometime in my first three months of being 37, I was able to check off another one - I found an appropriately sized and stylish black purse - I call that a win! I didn't buy a new shower curtain or finish reading the whole Bible, though.  In fact, I only completed 20 of the 37.  Let me rephrase that, I completed 20 of the 37 things I wanted to do last year - that's over half, and some of them were really big! ​

5 reasons you should make your own birthday goal list this year!
​
1.   It's fun
The goals can be anything - they can be meaningful or can be purely indulgent  I kept mine private so I didn't feel embarrassed about how silly or insignificant some may have seemed to others.  

2.   It's low pressure
This birthday goal list was in addition to areas of focus for the year and related goals, so they weren't high stakes to me.  They were just for fun and some were long shots - like I wanted to get 1,000 likes on my Facebook page - I made it to 335.  I'm not upset because it was just an arbitrary number and working to get there got me to where I am!
​
3.  It provides you multiple small wins
When you create lots of small, easy to attain goals, it makes you feel good about yourself as you check them off.  This gives you momentum and motivation to attack larger goals!  When you make attainable goals that are split up into digestible and measurable pieces, you set your self up for success.  For example, don't set a goal to "read more" instead, set a goal to read a book.  That's not too hard and once you've done it, you will likely want to do it again and again.    

4.  It allows you to dream of your future self
It's fun to daydream about where you will be in a year.  Thinking about how we want our future self to look, feel and act can be fun, but also help us to set goals to help us get there.  I often think about my future self - what would my future self appreciate me doing now (like stashing a dark chocolate Dove bar in my car's console so that I find it on a day I'm starving on my drive home and unexpectedly find this treat!); how will my future self feel when I've gotten through this tough season that I'm dealing with in the present (pride, joy, relief, or will I regret how I handled it?) ; or how will my future self benefit from this thing I'm doing today (exercising, eating right, etc.)  If you've never considered the concept of your future self, listen to this Happier with Gretchen Rubin podcast episode.

5.  It gives you perspective and helps you give yourself grace.
Since I made this birthday goal list last year, I was able to read through what I wrote last January and reflect on why those things were important to me then.  I realized some of them are no longer important to me now, and there are new things are in my life now that weren't even on my radar then.  I did transfer a few of the undone items from last year to this year that I still care about.  But I was also able to easily let go of some of the things I didn't accomplish.  I gave myself permission to just not do them - just like that - no guilt or explanation needed! 

Let us know in the comments if you make a birthday goal list this year! 

​One thing that I had no idea would happen in 2018 when I did my planning last year was that I would dip my toe into sales through Clever Container (and be pretty successful at it!)  Though this experience only lasted about 6 months - you can read about how I handled my disappointment about that here - it got me really excited about 2019! What is ahead for me that I can’t even fathom right now??  It also helped me realize that the unknown doesn’t have to be scary, it can be exhilarating! Be wary of counting on things to just fall into place, though. I really believe reflection and planning are still critical to our own success and well-being.  ​

It doesn’t matter that January 1 has come and gone - that’s just an arbitrary date that many people use to give them a clean slate, but you can do this exercise anytime!  Give it a try - ask yourself some questions about your past and your future.  It is really enlightening to see what commonalities appear and how you can get laser focused on certain areas of self-improvement and set yourself up for growth in ways you can’t even imagine at this point in time.

I’ll share my 2019 areas of focus with you below, but I want to be clear that these are just categories or cues for specific goals that I will create and review throughout the year.  Read about some goal setting tips here. This year I want to focus on:

• Shared experiences - I noticed last year that this is how I got to know people better, connected more with my family, and made lasting memories

​

• Home - I consistently desire more time at home and a more welcoming space - it’s time to make that happen!

​

• ​Creativity - I enjoy the creative pursuits I have tried, but just don’t allot enough time for them.  I also want to stretch and try something new.

​

• Calm - Stress wreaks havoc on my mind and body, and I want to slow down and spend more time in calming environments and learn strategies to control how I respond to situations.

I’d love to hear about your plan for this year!  Were you able to come up with just one word to drive your whole year, or do you have several areas to focus on?  What are you most excited about for 2019?  Share with us below in the comments or join me on Facebook!

On a whim, back before I'd even had the courage to publish my first blog post, I applied to be part of a book launch team for a new productivity book from the founder of the task management software I use, Nozbe. I was thrilled when I was selected as one of approximately 100 people worldwide who would have the opportunity to review and offer suggestions for this book. At that time, I had no idea that I'd actually be quoted in the book! It's been over a year, but the book has been written, edited, and published! 10 Steps to Ultimate Productivity by Michael Sliwinski is now available for purchase!! I'll give you a summary of some of the great content from this book below. Make sure to read to the end for info on how to get entered for your chance to win a copy!

The first thing you need to know about this book is that its author definitely has the authority to be writing it!  I had the honor tointerview Michael Sliwinski last year and learned about why he's a true productivity expert.  Click here to read the post for more background on the man who created a productivity platform that nearly half a million people use daily!

Each chapter of the book is one of the 10 steps to ultimate productivity.  For each step, you will be taught why it is important, learn from some real life examples, receive tips about how to put the step into practice in your own life.  There are also bonus materials that you can access online to help with your own personal productivity system. 

The ten steps are:​

1. Clear Your Mind
2. ​From Tasks to Projects
3. Focus on What's Most Important
4. ​Be Productive Anytime and Anywhere
5. Delegate Tasks to Achieve More - Work in a Team
6. Group Your Tasks and Shift Gears
7. Take Control Over Your Documents
8. ​Check Your System Regularly
9. Master Your Emails
10. What Else Can You Improve?

I'm so excited for you to read this book that I'm going to give you the chance to get one for FREE!  There are two ways to enter (and you can do either or both for an additional entry!)  ​A winner will be drawn on Thursday, January 17, 2019.

• Visit My Life In Order on Facebook, like the page if you haven't already,  and follow the instructions on the pinned post! 
• Follow My Life In Order on Pinterest, and repin the pin about 10 Steps to Ultimate Productivity from the Productivity and Time Management Board!

I have two weeks off for the first time since before I entered the workforce (of course I'm not counting maternity leave because that is NOT vacation!)  To say I'm excited is a severe understatement.  Many people have asked me what I'm doing and where I'm going.  My answer is nothing and nowhere - and that's by choice and why I'm thrilled!  I love the holidays - the decorating, the Christmas sweaters and socks, the cooking and baking, the gift giving and the family gatherings are all fun!  But just as much as I love the holidays, I love the fresh start of the new year that follows.  

I have a busy life just like most of you.  A wife, mother, daughter, granddaughter, sister, aunt, cousin, friend, volunteer, employee, boss, entrepreneur, piano teacher - there are so many roles I play.  I enjoy having all these varied experiences, but there is one area that I tend to neglect - ME!  

This week between Christmas and New Years is one of the best times to recharge your battery.  During my time off, I plan to reflect on the past year, plan for the new one, rest, relax, enjoy things I want to do, make memories with my family, declutter and purge, and reorganize.  Try this quick list of tasks to help you transition from the holidays to the new year!

1. Un-decorate - I prefer to leave my Christmas decorations for a few days after December 25, but no later than the weekend after New Years Day.  Once your decorations are down, you can see the new start that the new year brings.

​2. Purge - after receiving Chirstmas gifts, you are more likely to be willing to part with old items around the house.  I start with my kids' rooms where most of the new "stuff" from the holidays tends to end up.  We do a system of 20 minutes at a time of hard core work, going through every item and nook and cranny.  I have two kids so while one kid is decluttering with me in their room, the other gets some screen time.  We alternate until we are done.   I can't wait to complete the purging process in my own space as well - look out small appliances, your days may be numbered!  

As 2018 comes to a close, there are many decisions to make, but one of the biggest is which 2019 planner is best for you?  I'm kidding (a little) but if not one of the most important decisions, it's definitely one of the most fun! 

Planning saves time and helps us feel in control.  There are many options for planning tools from a simple notebook to a pretty planner to slick digital apps.  There is no perfect method for planning your days, but there several questions that you can answer to help you choose the right planner for you!

1. Do you prefer digital, paper or both?
2. Do you want to keep personal and professional plans separate or do you prefer one overarching system?
3. What do you want to include in your planner?  Appointments, tasks, ideas, and/or notes?
4. Where will you need to access your planner?  Will you carry it with you or leave it in one location?

Once you've answered these basic questions, you can move on to the more detailed options based on your paper vs. digital preference.  ​

Paper

• How big?  do you want to be able to fit it in your pocket or your purse, or do you carry a work bag or backpack?
• Does color matter?
• Do you like pages to lay flat?  Do you prefer spiral bound planners?
• Do you want the pages of your planner to be pre-printed or would you rather draw/write everything more like a bullet journal?
• Do you want calendar pages to have the dates filled in for you, or do you want to add your own dates?
• Do you want to have space for monthly, weekly and/or daily planning?  Is it important to have your days broken into timed increments?
• Do you want a to-do list on a separate page from your calendar or all in one area?
• What weight do you want your paper to be?  
• Do you want a hard or soft cover?  So you want the cover to be wipeable?
• How much do you want to spend on your planner?

Digital

• Do you want a calendar only or do you need a task manager as well?
• Do you want to be able to share the contents of your planning system either for others to view or to delegate?
• Do you want a free tool or a subscription based tool?  How much are you willing to spend?
• Do you want to be able to use your digital tool on a computer, a tablet, and/or a smartphone?
• Is it important to you to link to other apps? For example, do you want to integrate a task manager with your calendar or note taking apps?
• Do you want the ability to import and export information?
• Does the tool have the ability to categorize and color code items?

​I like a hybrid approach and use a digital calendar, digital task manager with digital reminders, as well as a paper planner.  I prefer to keep personal and professional somewhat separate, but do combine them in one view.  For example, on my iPhone's calendar app, I have my personal Google Calendar, my "side hustle" Google Calendar, and my work Outlook calendar overlaid on one another so I can see everything at once.  For me, I want to capture time bound meetings and appointments, deadlines, and special dates like birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar and to-dos in a task list.  I need a place to jot down notes and ideas, and a place to store a piece of notepaper as well.  It may seem redundant to have tasks in both a digital and written format, but the physical act of writing things down helps me process and remember them better.  When I transfer items from my digital task list to my physical planner during a regular planning time, it helps to cement in my mind what is truly a priority.

I am so excited that this year, I have the 5x8 size of the Simplified Planner by Emily Ley.  I'd been eyeing this online for quite some time, and then a few weeks ago, a friend who knows me well surprised me with a super cool and pretty 2019 planner!  I will set aside some reflection and planning time between Christmas and New Years to begin filling out this colorful notebook!  Here are a few tips I've learned over the years for written planners:

Buy a special writing utensil to use with your planner.   A mechanical pencil may be your best option - it's erasable, the tip will always be sharp and it won't bleed through the pages.  But there's something fun about using a special pen that writes so smoothly...  Just make sure to test pens on a small section of paper to make sure it doesn't bleed or smudge.  Different types of paper react differently to different types of ink.  Consider a couple of colors of pens/highlighters to use and make a system of what each color means.  For example, if you decide to add both work and personal obligations, you may want to use one color for work and one color for personal.
 
Create a way to keep your place.  Find a reliable bookmark, fun binder clip, or reusuable sticky note tab to mark your place in your paper planner.  My planner comes with tabs for each month, but I will still want to mark which date I'm on to make it that much quicker to do my planning.  

Decide how far out you will plan.  Most people do well to put in the big events for the whole year on the calendar and then plan around those on a monthly or weekly basis.  A quick review of your calendar and digital tools before bed allow you to write down your appointments and must dos the night before in your paper planner.  This will allow you to rest easier knowing you haven't forgotten anything and that you have a solid plan for the next day.    

Set a regular planning meeting with yourself and your family.   My husband and I both work full time and have a significant commute, plus have some volunteer commitments, lots of parenting commitments and also appreciate some downtime.  We have to have at least a weekly check in to figure out who's going to pick up the kids, what we will have for dinner, etc.    This doesn't have to be a formal meeting - ours is usually after a meal and we both whip out our phones and check who has to go in early, who has to stay late, and what kid's activities are coming up that week.  This allows us to plan our grocery shopping list and arrange childcare for the week ahead.  ​We invite each other to events using our digital calendars so know what is expected of us. 

I hope you can find your ideal planner in the next couple of weeks so you can start off your 2019 feeling like a planning rockstar!  If you have another planner you love, please share with us in the comments.

The title of my my blog is My Life In Order, but I have to admit, this weekend, I did not feel very orderly!  One of the things I enjoy most is ending - in a quick and unexpected way.  I learned this weekend that Clever Container is going out of business in just a couple of weeks.  Clever Container is a company I have worked for since June selling organizing supplies. It has been more fun and fulfilling and I was more successful at it than I ever expected!  I had plans for a long future and a lot of growth with the company, and it all just ended with one phone call. To say I’m disappointed is a severe understatement. ​

Over the weekend, I felt like doing a whole lot of nothing.  All my grand plans for Saturday got derailed when I learned this news.  I didn’t feel like cleaning, wrapping gifts, doing paperwork, or even spending quality time with my friends and family.  I really kind of wanted to just crawl into bed and binge on Netflix while eating chocolate, but instead, I trudged on reluctantly. I soon realized this disappointment was interfering with my productivity in a big way, and that made me kind of mad!  My future had already been changed by this news, and now I was struggling to do some basic tasks and to enjoy the things I normally look forward to. I had a couple of choices. I could be upset and wallow in it or I could control the things I could control in the moment.  For me, a clutter free house, organized paperwork, and a productive day are things that I can directly control. After giving myself some alone time to mope a little, I spent time doing things that had a visible impact in my house. I needed some quick wins to make me feel back in control.  Clean laundry and dishes, clear surfaces, and a to-do lists with lots and lots of checks were just what I needed!​

Next I wrote down part a Bible verse that most of us know “All things work together for good.” (Romans 8:28)  I knew this intellectually, but emotionally it was hard to accept! You’ve all heard the first part of this famous quote, “When one door closes another opens;”  but I had never heard the second half which is really profound,”but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”  Alexander Graham Bell, you were wise! Thinking about this, led me to write three words that gave me some hope:​

Around the holidays, I always get the urge to purge!  Life gets so busy between Thanksgiving and Christmas around my house with school programs, parties, shopping, decorating, family gatherings, etc.  It seems extra difficult for me to stay on top of the regular tasks like laundry, dishes and clutter, so this is the time that having less stuff is really appealing.  Whenever this feeling strikes me, I take advantage and get out some trash bags and cardboard boxes!  ​

I like to do pre-holiday purging in the areas that I'm most likely to acquire new stuff.  The prime location to begin, kids' rooms!  It's ideal to involve your kids in this process, explaining that if they want to enjoy new toys or gifts, they have to make some room.  I like to give the kids 5 options on every item in their room:

1. Keep for everyday use
2. Keep as a keepsake
3. Give away to someone we know
4. Donate 
5. Trash

For me and my sons, it works best if I'm in the room with them, holding up each item, but if you have older kids, they may be able to do this process on their own.  Since there are 5 options, we use 5 containers - a combination of trash bags, boxes and storage bins.  To be very thorough, have your smallest child crawl under the bed or to the back of the closet to make sure you get everything!  I have found that option 2, keep as a keepsake, has helped reduce the time it takes to make a decision.  Kids are sure about the things they want to keep and get rid of, but there are some items in between.  Rather than force them to decide one way or the other, we keep a box of keepsakes in the basement.  Occasionally (but not as often as we should) we go through those keepsakes and purge  further.  I also throw in the option of giving away to someone we know because it's easier to get rid of a beloved toy if they know it's going to their younger cousin who will like it (and they may get to play with it at their house, too!) 

Just like I make my kids go through this process, I like to do it myself on my clothes, coats, jewelry, and shoes.  It works out well since this time of year usually aligns with when I do my clothing seasonal switch.  I also like to go through things like CDs, movies, craft supplies, and kitchen gadgets.  If you want to do some in-depth work on your kitchen, check out my video series, 7 Days to an Orderly Kitchen! 

I have a hard time getting rid of things that prove my kids are growing up - like kids' movies and music,  games for younger kids, coloring books, and even little spoons and cups.  This is where giving to someone I know comes in handy for me.  I can much more easily part with a Sonic the Hedgehog activity book, a plastic Spiderman plate and silverware set, or Veggie Tales DVDs when I know my nephews (and now niece!) or a friend's child will enjoy them.  

​In addition to purging, I love to use this time to get organized as well.  The key is to be realistic about how you use your spaces and to store items near where they are typically used.  Using the correct storage solutions is important.  For example, you don't want to stack bins on top of one another that you want to access often. Instead, consider a shelf with bins, hanging closet shelves, a set of drawers, or stacking bins with front access.   Make a list of what storage problems you have and then do a little organization browsing online or in person.  Select one area to focus on first and either purchase or re-purpose some organizing supplies for that area to be complete.  This will give you so much more satisfaction than getting one thing for each room.  You can slowly add to your collection of organizing supplies as time goes on.

On my last day of Thanksgiving vacation, I'm planning a fun filled day of purging!  So family and friends (you know who you are,) prepare yourself for being offered a bunch of stuff we no longer need!  I remember receiving lots of hand-me-down clothes and toys from others who had older kids, and even if I didn't keep everything, I always appreciated free stuff and knowing that someone else thought enough of us to pass down things they used to love.   Happy pre-holiday purging to all!

Anger (/ˈaNGɡər/)  - a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure or hostility.  I've never thought of myself as an angry person, but I've realized lately that 'strong feeling of annoyance' can begin to control me.  When I use so much of my energy either thinking about why I'm angry, talking about it, or trying to stuff it down so I'm not rude, I don't have much left for the things that really need to get done.  Anger also causes me to stop thinking clearly, so even if I had energy left, my quality of work would suffer.

I want to use my energy in a positive way to accomplish my goals efficiently.  So how do I stop the feelings of annoyance and anger that suck up so much of that energy and cloud my thinking?   ​

• Determine what is causing the feelings of frustration.

It's so easy to blame others, and though people or situations can be the reason we feel frustrated, no one can cause us to feel a certain way.  We all have the power to reframe our situations and change our outlook. Try as we might, there may still remain some frustration in certain environments, so if you can remove yourself from a situation or at least limit the amount of time you spend in it, this can help reduce future anger.   Can you delegate tasks, reschedule appointments, or even give up activities that are making you feel overwhelmed, annoyed, or angry?  Prepare yourself when you know you have to enter a difficult situation by making notes of what you want to say or do (or want to avoid saying or doing!) 

• ​Acknowledge the feelings, and control them instead of letting them control you

​​I like to be in control, and when I'm not, I feel upset.  When I let annoyance get the best of me, I get even more upset with myself for letting that happen.  It's ironic that a lack of control can cause anger, but yet anger begins to control me - what a vicious cycle!   What if you said in your head, "na-na na-na boo-boo you can't make me mad!"  and created a new identity for yourself as someone who is slow to anger?  When you do get angry (because you're not perfect), learn how to channel that energy in a positive way - a walk or a run, rocking out to some music, or doing something creative may help you push through the negativity while still accomplishing something.

• Go on the offensive against your anger.​  

My pastor recently suggested that gratitude may be the opposite of anger.  Gratitude is a belief that can be chosen despite how you feel.  Try practicing gratitude on a regular basis to counteract annoyance.​  A daily practice like discussing what we are grateful for around the dinner table or keeping a gratitude journal has been proven to ward off negativity and improve health and well-being.  Researcher, Robert A. Emmons, Ph.D., has conducted multiple gratitude studies showing that gratitude increases happiness.  It's hard to stay angry while your happiness is increasing!

• ​Create a focus before you get frustrated!

Anger and frustration cloud our thinking, so if we don't already have a plan in place, it's going to be very difficult to formulate one with all those negative emotions swirling around.  That's why it's so important for us to plan ahead, keep an ongoing project and task list, and to create timelines and milestones for ourselves.   Brian Tracy, author of Eat That Frog!, says that "every minute spent in planning saves as many as ten minutes in execution."   I dare to speculate that if you were trying to execute while angry and hadn't planned beforehand, you would waste even more time!  If you have a system in place of where you capture your goals and related tasks, you may even be able to use some of your outstanding to-do's as a way to distract yourself from your emotions.  If you didn't already have tasks outlined or scheduled, it would be very difficult to make decisions on what needs to be done next in the midst of frustration.  Use digital tools like Nozbe, Trello, or Evernote to keep track of projects and tasks, or go the old school route and designate a special notebook for your to-do list.

Do you have other tips for keeping it together when you are dealing with a difficult situation or feeling angry?  Some readers may appreciate the tips heading into the holidays when stress levels and frustrations tend to run high!  Share with us in the comments.

Sources
Emmons, Robert A., and Michael E. Mccullough. “Counting Blessings versus Burdens: An Experimental Investigation of Gratitude and Subjective Well-Being in Daily Life.” Journal of Personality & Social Psychology, vol. 84, no. 2, 2003, pp. 377–389., doi:10.1037//0022-3514.84.2.377.

​Tracy, Brian. “Plan Ahead and Increase Productivity.” Brian Tracy's Self Improvement & Professional Development Blog, Brian Tracy International, 22 Sept. 2017, www.briantracy.com/blog/time-management/plan-ahead-and-increase-productivity/.